Veronica shares her trying to conceive (TTC) journey with honesty and strength. If you’ve ever felt overwhelmed, anxious, or unsupported while trying to conceive in a plus size body—this episode is for you.

The Emotional Roller Coaster of TTC

Veronica and her husband made the decision to grow their family in their early 30s, knowing there could be obstacles ahead.

Like many couples, they went into the experience with hope and excitement—but quickly found themselves navigating the complex emotions of monthly disappointment and the pressure of age.

And yes, we talked about that stat—how many of us have heard “it gets harder after 35.” It’s true that fertility shifts over time, but that looming number can make you feel like you’re racing against the clock.

And when you add in the reality of trying to conceive in a plus size body, there’s often even more pressure and anxiety layered on.

“We were just trying so hard to make sure we were hitting the right days,” Veronica shared. “After a few months, it really started to feel like a chore.”

TTC Tip: You are not alone if you find that the spark of intimacy gets replaced with ovulation trackers and calendars. It’s okay to acknowledge that and take breaks when needed.

Facing Pregnancy Loss and the Weight of Self-Blame

After nearly nine months of trying, Veronica saw a positive pregnancy test, only to experience an early miscarriage.

It was heartbreaking. Like so many people who experience pregnancy loss, Veronica wrestled with blaming herself.

“Was it my fault because I’m in a bigger body?” she wondered aloud.

This is such a common and painful feeling for people trying to conceive in a plus size body. I’ve been there too. But we have to keep reminding ourselves—miscarriage happens to people of all sizes. One in four pregnancies end in loss, and most of the time, we’ll never know why.

Here’s a helpful article: Navigating Miscarriage and Self-Blame as a Plus-Size Individual

Avoiding the Doctor Out of Fear of Weight Bias

One of the most powerful parts of our conversation was when Veronica shared why she didn’t seek medical support at the start of her fertility journey. The fear of being told to lose weight—or being dismissed altogether—kept her from booking an appointment.

“That would take the excitement out of the journey,” she said.

I hear this all the time. When you’re trying to conceive in a plus size body, the last thing you need is a provider who treats your body like a barrier instead of a vessel full of potential.

TTC Tip: If you’re not ready to see a doctor, that’s okay. But when you are, seek out size-friendly providers. Ask if they have large blood pressure cuffs, gowns, and seating—and if they are willing to support you without weight loss being the focus. Want even more tips? See our free guide from Plus Size Birth with tips on connecting with a size-friendly care provider.

What Care Providers Need to Hear

Veronica offered a clear message to healthcare professionals, especially those working in fertility and reproductive health:

“Hear me out first. Don’t make my weight the first and only thing you want to talk about.”

When care providers lead with weight bias, it creates shame and drives people away from getting the support they deserve. But it doesn’t have to be this way.

Listening, asking consent before discussing weight, and creating a welcoming environment can make all the difference.

Tip for Providers: Want to reduce weight stigma in your practice? Ask patients if they’d like to be weighed. Ask permission to discuss nutrition or physical activity. Treat every patient as a whole person, not a number on a scale. Learn even more by taking our size-inclusivity maternity training.

Pressing Pause—and Giving Yourself Grace

After their loss, Veronica and her husband made the incredibly self-aware decision to take a pause on trying.

It wasn’t easy, but it was necessary.

“It’s so good for your mental health,” Veronica shared. “Don’t feel bad if the pause ends up being longer than expected. It just means you needed that time.”

TTC Tip: Pausing isn’t giving up. It’s honoring your emotional needs. And sometimes, that space can be a powerful step toward healing.

Final Thoughts

Trying to conceive in a plus size body can be joyful, messy, empowering, and hard—all at once. Veronica’s story is a reminder that you are not alone, and your experience is valid.

Whether you’re actively trying, taking a break, or simply thinking about the future, I hope this episode leaves you feeling seen, supported, and hopeful.

Veronica, thank you for your vulnerability and your voice. And to every person out there trying to conceive in a plus size body—you are not alone, and you deserve compassionate, respectful care.

Recording & Show Notes: Plus Mommy Podcast Episode 236

Transcript happily provided upon request.

• Follow Veronica on Instagram: @veewelker_21
• 8 Strategies to Mitigate Weight Bias in Healthcare – Study Mentioned (Interview with Nurse Midwife Elizabeth Muñoz)
• Real Food for Pregnancy by Lily Nichols

Searching for more support? See all of our TTC in a plus size body resources over on Plus Size Birth.

This episode is brought to you by the Size-Friendly Birth Course—an online training for birth and postpartum professionals ready to provide size-inclusive care for people in larger bodies.

You’ll get:

• 🎥 Over 6 hours of video lessons
• 📘 A 115-page editable PDF workbook with guided activities
• 🕒 6 contact hours for professional development
• 📜 A certificate of completion
• 🌐 Bonus: Access to the Plus Size Birth Circle—our exclusive online platfor

The post Trying to Conceive in a Plus-Size Body: Veronica’s Story appeared first on Plus Mommy.

This conversation is filled with laughter, tears, and the kind of raw honesty that makes you feel like you’re catching up with a dear friend. From childhood pain to Hollywood red carpets, Chrissy shares how she continues to show up, authentically and wholeheartedly.

From Little Girl with Big Dreams to Emmy-Nominated Actress

When Jen launched the Plus Mommy Podcast back in 2018, Chrissy Metz was one of her dream guests. And now, here she is.

“I’m literally just a regular girl…trying to figure out this life thing,” Chrissy says humbly in response to Jen’s excitement.

Chrissy believes in the power of putting your dreams out there and watching them manifest—something she’s done again and again, even when she had just 81 cents in her bank account before landing This Is Us.

Chrissy spoke candidly about her childhood, including growing up as a “sad little girl” navigating divorce, blended family dynamics, and feeling unseen. “If she was seen, it was that she was too much,” she reflects. But through it all, her grandmother—affectionately known as Gram—offered her love and spiritual guidance. “I really believe that things happen for us, not to us.”

Kate’s Story Was Her Story—And Ours Too

The impact of Chrissy’s role on This Is Us cannot be overstated, especially for those who had never seen a plus-size woman portrayed with such care and complexity.

“I’m a big girl, and I don’t see big girls represented,” Jen shares, reflecting on how much it meant to watch Kate’s storyline unfold.

From a powerful miscarriage storyline to navigating fertility and motherhood, Kate’s experiences mirrored the real lives of so many—especially plus size parents who have often felt overlooked or blamed. Jen shared a deeply emotional moment from a blog post she wrote, We Need To Talk About Kate’s This Is Us Plus Size Birth Story, during the show’s run:

“Kate’s loss was my loss, and once again, I felt seen. This Is Us writers gave plus-size loss moms a gift when they didn’t blame Kate’s miscarriage on her weight. Through my tears, I was cheering.”

Chrissy recalls the care that went into crafting that storyline. “There has to be a gentleness to it and compassion around it,” she says. She also shared how cathartic it was to portray a daughter loved unconditionally by her on-screen father, Jack—something she never experienced herself.

“Jack loved Kate in every single way… I never knew that kind of love, and certainly not from a father figure.”

Behind the Scenes: Healing, Humor, and Real Talk

Despite playing such an emotional role, Chrissy found moments of humor and healing behind the scenes. She shared how acting alongside Chris Sullivan (Toby) helped her push through moments of self-doubt: “He looked at me and said, ‘You can.’ And I did.”

Chrissy also talked about what it was like to go from being cast in roles like “Chunk the Cheerleader” to wearing a fat suit on American Horror Story—and how that impacted her relationship with her body.

“When I took off my costume, I was still the chubby girl. Still the big girl.”

It was both a mind trip and a powerful reminder that while others could remove their prosthetics, she was living her experience in real life.

But through it all, she held onto her dream of performing—and found her way back to music and writing.

On Writing, Faith, and Big Feelings

Chrissy’s latest children’s book, When I Talk to God, I Talk About Feelings, is a follow-up to her first book When I Talk to God, I Talk About You. Inspired by the emotional conversations she had with children during readings of her first book, Chrissy knew this second story had to focus on feelings.

“I didn’t feel heard or seen as a kid, so this is going to be very healing and cathartic for me.”

Co-authored by Bradley Collins and illustrated by Lisa Fields, the book features a diverse cast of animal characters and subtle nods to inclusion, reminding children that all feelings are valid—and that everyone is worthy of love.

Accompanying the book is a new album titled Big Feelings, where each song focuses on a different emotion. “We have a sad song, disappointed, mad, excited, happy… all as a way to help kids name and process their emotions.”

A Life of Authenticity and Grace

Throughout the conversation, Chrissy offers so many gems of wisdom. One story that stuck is when Chrissy made a mistake at the studio gate and felt the shame spiral begin. Instead of letting it eat at her, she turned the car around, went back, and apologized.

“That was a very big moment for me in my life… You don’t have to feel bad forever. You can fix things.”

When asked to share a final word of encouragement, Chrissy left us with this powerful reminder:

“Nothing is personal.”

“We don’t know what people are going through… When we remember that, we can offer more grace to others—and to ourselves.”

Recording & Show Notes: Plus Mommy Podcast Episode 225

Transcript happily provided upon request.

Resources Mentioned On The Show

• Connect with Chrissy via her website, Instagram, and Facebook
• When I Talk to God, I Talk About Feelings
• Actor Jen Ponton Dishes About Dietland, Fat Activism, And More
• Freebie: We Can Do Hard Things: Audio Support for Your Appointments

This episode is brought to you by the Size-Friendly Birth Course—an online training for birth and postpartum professionals ready to provide size-inclusive care for people in larger bodies.

You’ll get:

• 🎥 Over 6 hours of video lessons
• 📘 A 115-page editable PDF workbook with guided activities
• 🕒 6 contact hours for professional development
• 📜 A certificate of completion
• 🌐 Bonus: Access to the Plus Size Birth Circle—our exclusive online platform and mobile app for on-the-go learning and community support

Use code PLUSMOMMY for 20% off at plussizebirth.com!

The post Chrissy Metz Talks Fame, Faith, and Finding Her Way appeared first on Plus Mommy.

As a queer individual in a sperm-less relationship, Karen knew their path to parenthood would be unique and medicalized.

Their journey, filled with ups and downs, ultimately led to the birth of their beautiful child. Along the way, Karen gathered invaluable insights and advice for plus size and queer individuals navigating similar paths.

A Queer Plus Size Fertility Story

Karen’s journey began with the understanding that getting pregnant would involve medical intervention.

Meeting their partner, navigating assumptions and biases from medical professionals, and enduring an unexpected cancer diagnosis were just the beginning.

Karen faced multiple setbacks, including a reproductive endocrinologist who made assumptions based on their size and prescribed medication without proper diagnosis.

Determined to find the right care, Karen sought second opinions and switched providers until they found a reproductive endocrinologist who treated them with respect and provided evidence-based care.

Their persistence paid off, leading to multiple rounds of intrauterine insemination (IUI) and in-vitro fertilization (IVF), eventually resulting in a successful pregnancy.

Despite the medical hurdles, including a critical decision about a fibroid removal and miscarriage, Karen’s story is one of triumph!

They ultimately gave birth and built a beautiful family!  

Advice for Plus Size Individuals

Find the Right Provider: Don’t be afraid to seek multiple opinions and switch providers if you’re not comfortable. Karen emphasized the importance of having a compassionate, evidence-based care provider who respects and validates your individual health needs.

Ask Questions Upfront: Ensure your fertility clinic can accommodate your needs, especially regarding procedures like egg retrieval. Ask about their policies and experiences working with plus size individuals.

Advocate for Yourself: If a medical professional makes assumptions about your health based on your size, don’t hesitate to speak up. Karen shared how asserting their needs and clarifying their health status helped them avoid unnecessary medications and treatments.

Comfort Matters: If certain medical staff or procedures make you uncomfortable, request alternatives. Karen highlighted the importance of having ultrasound technicians who are skilled in working with different body types and requesting specific providers for comfort.

Advice for Queer Individuals

Seek Queer-Friendly Providers: It’s crucial to find medical professionals experienced in working with queer individuals and couples. Ask about their experience and comfort in providing queer-inclusive care.

Educate and Advocate: Be prepared to educate your providers about your needs and advocate for yourself. Karen shared instances where they had to correct assumptions and educate their providers on gender and pronoun usage.

Build a Support Network: Surround yourself with supportive individuals, including doulas, who understand and respect your journey. Karen’s doula provided crucial support, offering evidence-based information and emotional encouragement throughout the process.

Trust Your Intuition: Throughout their journey, alogn with the support of their partner, Karen trusted their intuition about what felt right for their body and their baby. This intuition guided their decisions.

By seeking compassionate care, asking the right questions, and trusting your intuition, you can navigate your fertility journey with confidence and resilience.

Listen to Karen’s full story and helpful advice during episode 217 of the Plus Mommy Podcast.

Recording & Show Notes: Plus Mommy Podcast Episode 217

Transcript happily provided upon request.

Resources Mentioned On The Show

• Listen to more queer plus size fertility and pregnancy podcast episodes and read birth stories.

The post Karen’s Queer Plus Size Fertility Story: Self-Advocacy and Triumph appeared first on Plus Mommy.

Can you relate? I’ve spent most of my adult life trying not to get pregnant. And now that my fertility window is rapidly closing getting pregnant feels illusive.

This is a raw and vulnerable look at my fertility journey ending, shared in two podcast episodes recorded three years apart.

Fat, Forty, And Questioning Fertility

Will I ever be at peace that I only had one child?

Can I have a healthy pregnancy being fat, forty, and struggling with fertility?

Am I too old to start all over again with a newborn?

All of these questions have played on repeat in my head, so I hit record and poured out my uncertainties during this episode of the Plus Mommy Podcast.

I’m fat, forty, and I’m figuring out my fertility!

Transcript happily provided upon request.

Letting Go Of My Fertility Journey And Finding Peace

Flash forward three years, I’m nearing 43, and I’ve found peace with letting go of a dream of having more children.

For years, I’ve wondered when I’d find that peace and how I’d come to a place of letting go of my fertility.

As I did three years prior, I turned my recorder on and talked openly about my fertility journey. And letting go!

It’s my deepest hope that anyone questioning their fertility will be proactive immediately.

See a care provider for a preconception visit, so you have more information to make the choice you feel is best. Because life will pass by faster than you’ll ever imagine, your fertility window will eventually close even if you’re not ready for it to end.

This is my story!

Transcript happily provided upon request.

Resources Mentioned On The Show

• My 300 lb Birth Story 
• My Miscarriage Story
• Plus Size Birth website and Plus Mommy Instagram.

Thank You To Our Sponsor:

This episode about being fat, forty, and questioning my fertility was brought to you by Plus Size Birth! Use coupon code Plus Mommy to receive 20% off the My Plus Size Pregnancy Guide. This guide covers everything you could want to know about having a plus size pregnancy.

The post Fat, Forty, And Questioning My Fertility appeared first on Plus Mommy.

Heather always dreamed of becoming a mom. But, as she got older knowing it’s harder to become pregnant when you’re advanced maternal age, she wondered if her dream would become a reality.

When she finally became pregnant, she sadly experienced a devastating miscarriage.

Eventually, her dreams came true! Heather found out she was pregnant around the time that would’ve been the due date of her loss.

While she was thrilled to be pregnant, she experienced so much anxiety during her pregnancy. Heather kept worrying that she’d have another loss.

Heather’s medical records noted that she had a high BMI and was of advanced maternal age. However, she felt like conversations about increased risks didn’t come up during her visits. She almost wished there would’ve been more conversations, and wondered if her provider didn’t say anything for fear of offending her.

Related: What The Media Gets Wrong About Plus Size Pregnancy Risks

Heather believed she could have a healthy outcome and didn’t allow her age to bother her. However, when it came to her weight, she had dealt with size bias in the past and worried how it might come up in her pregnancy.

Heather advocated for having her blood pressure taken at the end of her prenatal visits, and this helped to reduce her anxiety.

Her pregnancy progressed without any issues. Even so, her care provider started pressuring her to have an induction at 39 weeks.

This is when Heather started pushing against routine induction for advanced maternal age.

Heather had a frank conversation with her care provider that she did not want to have an induction at 39 weeks unless it was a true medical concern. She consented that she would be okay with having an induction at 40 weeks and six days.

At 40 weeks and one day, her baby was ready to be born, and she went into labor on her own!

Listen as Heather shares her advanced maternal age and plus size birth story during episode 168 of the Plus Mommy Podcast.

Recording & Show Notes: Plus Mommy Podcast Episode 168

Transcript happily provided upon request. 

Resources Mentioned On The Show:

• Why You Should Advocate For A Plus Size Blood Pressure Cuff 
• How Doulas Support Plus Size Moms
• How To Navigate A Broken System with Dr. Christine Sterling, OBGYN

The post Pushing Against Induction For Advanced Maternal Age – Heather’s Story   appeared first on Plus Mommy.

Twins Plus Size Pregnancy

Before we get started, it’s important to note that not all twin pregnancies and birth stories are as traumatic as what you’ll read here. But each account is valid and teaches us a lot. 

Lynneah had a panic attack when she found out that she was pregnant with twins during her first ultrasound. Aside from the twin’s dad having one distant relative with twins, there was no family history of twins on either side. 

One of the most challenging parts of being pregnant with multiples that doesn’t get discussed often is the heightened focus on potential complications. So it was especially hard for Lynneah when her providers would discuss the increased risk of miscarriage and the babies likely needing to stay in the NICU.

She wanted her pregnancy to be a time for joy and celebration. But this was such a stressful time in her life that she even considered terminating her pregnancy. And while that can be scary to open up about, and she wouldn’t change a thing now, Lynneah has found she isn’t alone in having those thoughts. 

Beyond just the reality of doubling the number of diapers and all baby necessities, there was also a shift in her maternity care plan. 

Initially, Lynneah was working with midwives, but she learned that she would be having a high-risk pregnancy and needed to work with maternity fetal specialists. Of course, she wanted whatever was best for her and her babies, but this was disappointing news. 

She immediately became educated on everything she needed to know about her twins plus size pregnancy journey. 

Related: Miranda’s Plus Size Fertility And Birth Story

As a plus size woman pregnant with twins whose mother had a history of having big babies, Lynneah was warned early on about the risk of gestational diabetes. Thankfully, this was a complication she avoided, but there was a focus on her weight gain throughout her pregnancy. 

While Lynneah started showing early on in her pregnancy, often people commented on how small she looked to be pregnant with twins. She felt this was a judgment because she’s plus size – and it hurt. 

For her, it was an early lesson that motherhood is a time when people make so many unsolicited comments and judgments.

Twenty-eight weeks into her pregnancy, her world turned upside down. 

At the end of a regular prenatal visit, her care provider noticed she looked more swollen than usual. When her OB-GYN rechecked her blood pressure, he made a face. Lynneah knew something was wrong, and that was confirmed when they brought a wheelchair into the room. 

Rushed to the hospital with her care providers having concerns about preeclampsia, Lynneah was in a state of shock. 

Twins Plus Size Birth Story

The twin’s dad arrived as they had Lynneah hooked up to monitors to make sure the babies were okay. Unfortunately, it also turned out that the wrong size blood pressure cuff was used. That’s something plus size people experience often, and it’s critical to advocate for the correct size cuff. 

Thankfully they started using the correct size cuff, but that only furthered their concerns that Lynneah had developed preeclampsia.

Once a bed opened up in labor and delivery, she was taken upstairs, hooked up to many monitors. Lynneah received a lot of medication to help lower her blood pressure and shots in her legs to help with the twin’s lung development. 

The twin’s heart rates remained stable, which was all Lynneah cared about throughout this ordeal. Everything else felt utterly overwhelming! 

Related: I Knew Something Was Wrong – A Preeclampsia Birth Story

The next day began the balancing act of keeping Lynneah’s blood pressure stable to allow the babies to continue developing before being born. Unfortunately, she also learned she couldn’t go back to work. But thankfully, her company was terrific, and she felt so supported. 

Lynneah knew she wouldn’t be leaving the hospital until the babies were born, but she didn’t know how long that would be! At first, it was incredibly hard as she spent her days alone.

After four weeks in the hospital full of monitoring, poking, and prodding to keep everyone well, she had an emergency cesarean on Labor Day, just over 32 weeks into her pregnancy. 

Sadly it took three tries to get the spinal block in Lynneah, and she couldn’t take it anymore. She begged them to put her under, but thankfully they got the spinal to work. 

And then her babies were born! She heard her daughter cry, but not her son. It felt like an eternity until her son started to cry, but he finally did. Unfortunately, the babies needed some immediate care, so they got rushed out of the room before seeing her babies. 

It took a full day before she saw her babies, but she was so in love once she did! 

Listen below to Lynneah’s twins plus size pregnancy and birth story. She also shares openly about her postpartum mental health struggles. 

Recording & Show Notes: Plus Mommy Podcast Episode 164

Transcript happily provided upon request. 

Resources Mentioned On The Show:

• Connect with Lynneah via her Twins and Coffee blog, Instagram, and Facebook.
• An article mentioned during the episode – I Struggle with Accepting my NICU Birth Story
• Get support for your mental health during pregnancy and postpartum by speaking to your care provider and tapping into resources like Postpartum.net.

Lynneah is the single mama of boy-girl twins, Kendall and Caeden, and lives in the Seattle, Washington area as of March 2020. She sets out to help mamas feel empowered and confident in their lives with the mindset of helping them learn to love themselves from the ground up. She shares the raw and vulnerable side of life from motherhood to body image and mental health and hopes to inspire those around her to start pushing for a life they don’t want to run away from.

The post Lynneah’s Raw And Unfiltered Twins Plus Size Pregnancy And Birth Story appeared first on Plus Mommy.

DeAnna’s Pregnant Pole Dancing Story

DeAnna, a pole dancing instructor from Memphis, Tennessee, experienced a heartbreaking pregnancy loss in January of 2020.

Along with the support of her partner, she found strength and healing from therapy and her Black Girls Pole community.

In the middle of June 2020, with the pandemic raging and Black Lives Matter protests happening, DeAnna and her partner became pregnant again. While it was stressful to be pregnant, DeAnna found support from her favorite outlet – pole!

During her first prenatal visit, DeAnna could not see her regular OB-GYN. As a Black woman, well aware of the high mortality rates for Black women and babies during childbirth, she wanted a Black physician.

This first doctor DeAnna saw focused on her weight immediately and told her not to gain more than 15 lb during her plus size pregnancy.  

To DeAnna’s relief, she was able to see her regular care provider for all of her other appointments. And this doctor told DeAnna not to worry about her weight, as she was more focused on DeAnna having hypertension.

She took progesterone for the first 12 weeks of pregnancy after researching how it could reduce her risk of another miscarriage. Her care provider was very supportive.

DeAnna had her care provider’s blessing to keep up her favorite physical activity until near the end of pregnancy. However, as a pregnant pole dancing woman, she kept things low to the ground.

DeAnna had to make adjustments as her body shape and size changed and equilibrium shifted throughout her pregnancy. See a video of DeAnna pole dancing while pregnant.

With the help of blood pressure medication and monitoring her blood pressure daily, DeAnna remained healthy throughout her pregnancy.

Related: What It’s Like To Be Pregnant When You Are Black And Plus Size

When she was 37 weeks and three days pregnant, DeAnna consented to an induction due to concerns about her elevated blood pressure.

Throughout 28 hours, the incredible labor and delivery staff did all they could to help get her son into the optimal position for birth. But unfortunately, the baby was in a transverse position, and nothing seemed to make him budge. So, DeAnna needed a c-section.

Thankfully, her cesarean birth experience as a plus size woman was positive. However, one thing that stood out was her belly getting taped out of the way for her baby to be born.

Due to her son being born early, he struggled to take a bottle and had low birth weight. A few days into her hospital stay, overwhelm set in. And a lovely nurse encouraged her to rest and allow the baby to go to the nursery. After that, things got better, and with her partner’s support and a great care team, her son fed well enough to leave the hospital as a family.

It took a few months for DeAnna to start feeling like herself again, especially going from a pregnant pole dancing goddess to a new mom working to embrace her beautifully changed body.

Just like how she felt supported by her pole community during pregnancy, the same goes for her postpartum journey!

Hear DeAnna tell her story in her own words during episode 158 of the Plus Mommy Podcast.

Recording & Show Notes: Plus Mommy Podcast Episode 158

Transcript happily provided upon request. 

Resources Mentioned On The Show:

• Connect with DeAnna via her Instagram. Learn more about her pole dancing classes with Not Your Average Workout, located in Memphis, Tennessee.

The post From Pregnant Pole Dancing Instructor To One Strong Mother appeared first on Plus Mommy.

Today, with access to safe and legal abortion going away for many in states like Texas, I can no longer remain silent. I’m ready to tell my story. Not only my abortion story but what it was like to become a mother years after having an abortion.

I will always stand up for choice, just as I will always support those who make a different choice than I did all those years ago.

Recording & Show Notes: Plus Mommy Podcast Episode 152

Resources Mentioned On The Show:

• Is It Rape If
• A Dad’s Perspective On Plus Size Pregnancy, Birth, and Miscarriage

The post I Want To Talk About Becoming A Mother After Having An Abortion appeared first on Plus Mommy.

Disclosure: Plus Size Birth is a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program. As an Amazon Associate, I earn from qualifying purchases. Read more about these links in my disclosure policy.

Plus Size With Hyperemesis Gravidarum

Before we talk about how being plus size with hyperemesis gravidarum is different, let’s talk about HG in general.

What is hyperemesis gravidarum?

The definition below is from the National Library of Medicine from the National Institutes of Health.

“Hyperemesis gravidarum is extreme, persistent nausea and vomiting during pregnancy. It can lead to dehydration, weight loss, and electrolyte imbalances. Morning sickness is mild nausea and vomiting that occurs in early pregnancy.”

During the first three months of pregnancy, it’s common to experience morning sickness. Morning sickness consists of feeling nauseous or even vomiting. For many people, it happens in the morning, hence the name. For some, it doesn’t matter the time of day it occurs.

The difference with HG is the severity of the symptoms and that it lasts the entire pregnancy.

What causes hyperemesis gravidarum?

The reason people experience nausea and vomiting during pregnancy isn’t fully known. Some believe it’s due to the quickly rising blood level of the HCG hormone.

The placenta releases the HCG hormone. And yes, that’s the same hormone detected in pregnancy tests!

Always contact your care provider first, but below are two recommended products for relief with hyperemesis gravidarum.

Plus size with hyperemesis gravidarum? Here’s what’s different!

There are weight gain restrictions for people with a high BMI.

When you’re having a plus size pregnancy, your care provider might recommend limiting weight gain during pregnancy.

The Institute of Medicine weight gain recommendations for pregnancy goes off the Body Mass Index (BMI).

BMI 25–29.9 (overweight) = 15–25 lb
BMI of 30+ (obese) = 11–20 lb

Some care providers encourage people with a BMI over 30 to not gain weight and even promote weight loss.

It’s one thing for a provider to talk about nutrition and physical activity in a compassionate manner and weight loss is a bi-product of behavioral changes.

In comparison, what we often hear are stories of care providers telling plus size people they can’t gain weight during pregnancy and people turning to restrictive dieting to lose weight.

There was even a study that showed adverse outcomes for weight loss during pregnancy for people with a high BMI, including increased rates of preterm births and small-for-gestational-age infants

Plus size pregnant people have shared accounts of being fearful of eating before prenatal appointments. They are afraid of being shamed for their size and any weight gain.

All this said, when you combine a push for zero weight gain during pregnancy with a plus size person actively losing weight, you can see why praise for weight loss sometimes replaces concerns for hyperemesis gravidarum.

If you’re losing a significant amount of weight during pregnancy due to extreme morning sickness make sure your care provider isn’t dismissing your concerns. If they are, you can fire your care provider at any time and connect with a size-friendly care provider.

On the flip side, as you’ll hear in Alyssa’s story below, some people cope with extreme morning sickness by eating a lot of carbohydrates. When concerns of sickness are addressed by plus-size people, they can be dismissed if weight gain is occurring.

Connect with a size-friendly care provider!

Plus size people, regardless if they have HG or not, should try to connect with a size-friendly care provider.

A size-friendly care provider is an OB-GYN, Midwife, or Nurse Practioner who practices evidence-based compassionated care.

While they will probably address weight (and even recommended weight gain limits), they do so in a manner that doesn’t make you feel ashamed of your size.

Most importantly, a size-friendly care provider doesn’t dismiss your concerns nor blame everything on your weight.

(Here’s a free guide from Plus Size Birth on how to connect with a size-friendly care provider).

Plus Size With Hyperemesis Gravidarum – Alyssa’s Birth Story

We can learn so much about what it’s like to have a medical condition and not feel supported by hearing people’s stories.

With Alyssa’s first pregnancy, she was diagnosed with severe morning sickness, not HG.

She found the only way to keep her nausea at bay was to eat a lot of carbohydrates.

Alyssa felt like she was constantly eating because she didn’t feel sick if her belly was full, and because of this, she kept gaining weight.

During every prenatal appointment, Alyssa would address her concerns about being so sick. She repeatedly asked what she could do.

Her OB-GYN responded by saying her morning sickness clearly wasn’t a big issue because Alyssa kept gaining weight.

One of the main symposiums of HG is weight loss, but it’s not the only one.  

Four months into her pregnancy, Alyssa was so sick she had to close down her bakery – her dream job built from the ground up.

This wasn’t just morning sickness!

Related: Supporting Plus Size Labor And Delivery With Mommy Labor Nurse

Alyssa hired a doula who encouraged her to advocate for herself. Her doula was the first person to say the words “hyperemesis gravidarum.”

Twenty-four weeks into her pregnancy, Alyssa switched care providers.

Unfortunately, this new provider wasn’t the best fit either, and her concerns remained unheard because the number on the scale continued to go up.

Alyssa’s water broke at 36 weeks.

While she wanted an unmedicated birth, she was open to whatever needed to happen, especially with a preterm baby.

After twelve hours, she received pitocin to get labor going, and following that, there was a cascade of interventions.

Following fifteen hours, Alyssa felt the urge to push, but people didn’t believe her. She was right, and following fifteen minutes of pushing, her son was born.

Thankfully he was a healthy baby!

Following giving birth, Alyssa’s nausea went away completely. Due to the treatment she received, Alyssa questioned herself and thought maybe her sickness wasn’t so bad.

It took becoming pregnant again, following a miscarriage, and connecting with two different providers, that finally, she felt validated.  

Listen to Alyssa’s full story, and how she took a different approach during her second plus size pregnancy with HG, during episode 145 of the Plus Mommy Podcast below or via your favorite podcast app.

Recording & Show Notes: Plus Mommy Podcast Episode 145

Resources Mentioned On The Show:

• Alyssa recommends the following HG resources; hyperemesis.org (HG Moms on Instagram) and HG support on Reddit.
• Products Alyssa recommends for relief with HG; EmeTerm Relieve Nausea Electrode Stimulator For morning sickness, motion travel sickness, and vomit relief and Liquid I.V. Hydration Multiplier, Electrolyte Powder.
• You can connect with Alyssa on Instagram at @letstryfortwo.

Thank You To Our Sponsor:

Use coupon code PlusMommy to receive 20% off the My Plus Size Pregnancy Guide that covers everything you could want to know about having a plus size pregnancy.

The post No One Talks About Being Plus Size With Hyperemesis Gravidarum appeared first on Plus Mommy.

Loralyee Shares Her Birth Story

Around the age of fifteen, Lori was diagnosed with Polycystic Ovary Syndrome (PCOS).

Her care provider said she would never have a baby.

Throughout her adult life, Lori assumed it would be difficult or impossible to become a mother.

For seven years, Lori and her husband tried to start a family.

Following two devastating miscarriages, they sought fertility support.

Each time she tried to connect with a care provider for fertility treatments as a plus size woman, the response was to lose weight.

After seeing four doctors, Lori decided to focus on her health and stopped stressing herself out.

As she shares, “The last six, seven years before getting pregnant, I had a really hard relationship with my body. I was always mad at it. I was always putting all these different [fertility] drugs in it. And so I thought of it like I was going to cleanse my body, I was going to cleanse my spirit. And I wanted to make my body prepared to become a home for my baby for the next nine months.”

Over on her Loralyee Instagram account, she was transparent about the changes she was making.

As she focused on herself, 2020 hit, and the world shut down.

Lori and her husband spent more time together than usual, and to her great surprise – she got pregnant!

Related: What Fertility Clinics Don’t Want To Admit About Weight Bias

Very early on in her pregnancy Lori went to the OB-GYN because of her miscarriage history.

They couldn’t find her baby’s heartbeat and asked her to come back in a few days.

At the follow-up appointment, they couldn’t find the heartbeat again and told Lori that she would have a miscarriage.

Her care provider prescribed a pill.

“I was like, NO, something feels different this time. Like I had really bad nausea, and I felt pregnant. So she made me sign a form saying that I was leaving, although she told me to take the pill.”

The following week was devastating, and Lori returned to her provider once more, thinking she would take the pill.

To her wonderful surprise, the ultrasound picked up the heartbeat!

Lori’s plus size friend was also pregnant, so Lori switched to her friend’s care provider, hoping they’d be size-friendly.

While Lori felt more supported, this new care provider’s office had her jump through extra hoops because of her size.

She experienced great anxiety as they made her feel like she would develop complications because of her size.

“Like I had a perfect pregnancy besides being nauseous, but every time they were surprised, and the way they acted, they were surprised that everything was going so well.”

Overall she liked the practice and stayed; Lori just wished she felt more supported.

Due to hospital visitor restrictions, she was so sad to learn that she couldn’t have her mother attend the birth. So, Lori felt it was essential to hire a doula to support her and her husband.

Thanks to a close friend’s recommendation, Lori researched different doulas and felt that Denise Bolds was the perfect match.

Related: 7 Things You Should Know About Being Plus Size And Pregnant

“The first conversation speaking to her, I was like speaking like a family member. She was very caring and would listen to my story. She had like the right questions, but she was also very thorough. And that’s what I needed.”

Lori had no complications during her pregnancy, but her care provider wanted to induce her because of her weight. They feared her developing preeclampsia.

The last few weeks of her pregnancy, Lori’s anxiety was through the roof because she feared something would go wrong. She thought she was going to die during birth because of how everyone made her feel.

Being induced helped reduce her fears, and she felt more in control of what was happening to her body.

On a Thursday at 2:00 pm, she went in for her induction.

Lori was 39 weeks and two days along with a soft cervix, but she wasn’t dilated.

She didn’t want her doula right away because she knew this was a long process.

Lori’s induction began with a foley bulb to help her cervix to diolate. She dilated much quicker than anyone expected!

“The cramps weren’t as bad as I thought they were going to be. But also I feel like having PCOS prepared me for that because my PCOS cramps during my period are so bad. So it felt like that.”

Soon after, they started the Pitocin, and her cramps became far more intense.  

After many hours of laboring, Lori wanted an epidural.

They brought in three anesthesiologists who poked her twice before Lori said she wanted her doula there!

Denise was supporting her over the phone the entire time, and Lori was ready to have her in-person.

Related: Know Your Options During Pregnancy And Birth When You’re Plus Size

About an hour or two after receiving the epidural, Lori went into active labor.

The nurses and doctor kept saying she couldn’t be progressing so quickly.

Lior knew her body!

Denise arrived right as Lori’s body was telling her to push.

Immediately Denise went into action and made all the difference!

“She put her hand on my chest, and that feeling, I honestly put chills through my whole body because I felt like it just like released me from the tense feeling that I was feeling before she got there, and it just helps my body relax. And so she put her hand on my chest. She helped me breathe. She like put me in different positions to help me.”

Even the nursing staff was in awe of how Denise was supporting Lori.

Everyone who came into her labor room was amazed by how quickly everything progressed.

Lori gave birth to her son in three pushes!

“I just amazed at myself. I was amazed at my body, right? Because my relationship, my body was so complicated over the years, and I felt so mad at it thinking that it wasn’t going to do what it needed. And then it did. It amazed me, you know, the first my whole pregnancy and then it makes me even more, you know, giving birth. And so I’m just so proud of the way that I was able to do that.”

Listen below as Lori shares her full plus size pregnancy and birth story. She also goes into detail about what postpartum has been like for her and her family.

Recording & Show Notes: Plus Mommy Podcast Episode 140

Resources Mentioned On The Show:

• Follow Loralyee on Instagram.
• Connect with Denise Bolds via her website and Instagram.
• Learn more about taking baby aspirin during pregnancy.

Thank You To Our Sponsor:

Use coupon code PlusMommy to receive 20% off the My Plus Size Pregnancy Guide that covers everything you could want to know about having a plus size pregnancy.

The post Plus Size Model Loralyee Shares Her Birth Story For The First Time appeared first on Plus Mommy.